The Little World of Barnum T Jugbat

OK, is it me or is the Boots blister pack recycling scheme that difficult? I have tried on several occasions to use it, it took a long time to actually register for the damn thing, without success.
I have eventually managed to identify the packs that are acceptable, and it’s not many of the multiple packs we have, but now I have to scan something. But it doesn’t say what needs to be scanned or how.
Should I just carry on with my policy of scraping as much foil off the plastic as possibility, eventually creating a satisfying ball to go in the recycling, and binning the plastic? Or has anyone an alternative? After all Boots, I believe, is an American owned company and deserves to be boycotted ad much as possible at the moment.

Another conversation with my old mate Alan Edwards , who many of you know and regularly disagree with his thought provoking insights on life.
He was telling me of a recent conversation in regular local GBG pub on a Wednesday.
‘Could I change this beer please? I think it’s off.’
Bar person picks up glass and raises it towards nose but about about halfway says, ‘It smells awful. It was only put on Tuesday.’
‘Oh, it shouldn’t be like that after one day.’
‘No, I mean last Tuesday.’
It was replaced with good grace for a cracking pint. However it was still on when I left the pub.
So my two scores were ‘Undrinkable’ and ‘Good’.
Like him, I’m just wondering how many other people score Undrinkable beers on the CAMRABeer Scoring system.
Being the GOGGODs we are famous for we also log, but do not rate, those beers on Untapped, CaskFinder etc. Usually with comments like ‘Too warm for meaningful comment ‘ or ‘Unfair to the brewer to rate.’ This is being honest and we hope helpful to customers, pubs, and brewers alike. In the conversation above the landlord wasn’t about, only the person behind the bar, so further feedback wasn’t possible.
If we are wrong to do this, or you disagree we would love to hear you views and suggestions for improving feedback and dialogue between everyone.
Just to finish with another illustration. Another GBG pub and I took the beer back saying ‘This beer is warm (18.4C), flat and doesn’t taste right.’
The bar person said, with good grace, ‘Would you like another?’ and before I could say anything started pulling a pint from the same pump.
I stopped them and explained that I would prefer a different beer and it might be better to take the beer off. I got my replacement, which was ‘Acceptable ‘ but they said they couldn’t take the other off as they were the only person working that afternoon.
Are we that unlucky?

I walk into one of my local ‘Spoons. There is a queue at one of the at least 14ft long bars. I go to the bar, am served immediately and then say ‘Excuse me’ as I want to get to the rest of the pub.

Someone states,’There is a queue’ to which I reply, ‘Yes, what are you queueing for?’ The conversation continues with others joining in.

‘We are waiting to be served’

‘But there is a whole bar free, why are you queuing?’

‘ Because you always queue in Wetherspoons and other pubs’

I’ve never queued in this or any other pub’

You should have gone to the back of the queue and waited your turn, it isn’t fair.’

Show me the sign requesting me to queue, this isn’t the post office. The staff, if they are any good, know who’s next to serve’.

‘That’s not true, you got served before us.’

‘That’s because I was at the bar and could be served. Do you expect them to shout over people for their orders?’

‘That’s not the point, we were all in front of you and should have been served first. We always queue. Next time join the queue and wait.’

‘Sorry but I going to enjoy my pint. Feel free to queue if you feel it necessary but pleasedon’t impose your views on other, just as experienced, pyb goers.’

This paraphrases two conversations I have had recently and ignores the pointed, and often rude, remarks I have heard in similar situations. Where did this queueing lark come from? Any driver worth their salt knows that in most cases you get to the bar in good order, the scrum has a life of it’s own. On getting to the bar the staff know the order, or most of us will say that someone else’s turn is before ours. It works.

Amongst the only issues are those with loud voices who wave credit cards around and demand service, those who get to the bar without having decided what they want, and the bar hogs who sit or stand at the bar because they always have and bugger anyone else.

These types are dealt with in time honoured fashion and are part of the life and lore of the pub. I wouldn’t have it any other way. A pub is all things to all people.

Now about the beer ……

Beer is made from four simple ingredients. Water, malt, hops,and yeast. But, to me, other factors include the brewing equipment, location of brewery, and circumstances of said brewery.

If a brewery moves, for whatever reason, the beers go with it. No problem, keep the names and try to recreate the same flavours and enjoy a bit of leeway.

Take over and close a brewery, it’s a different matter. I feel it amounts to fraud and dishonesty to take the name of a taken over and closed brewery and use it to sell beers brewed elsewhere at a different, still functioning brewery.

The recipe may be the same but due to that factors I have listed above it cannot be the same beer. If it is that good, and I admit several erstatz beers are, give it a new name and let it stand on it’s own feet.

This tirade has been brought on by several accolades I gave read about the new ‘Bass No1’. It might be a good beer but it came from the Bass Brewery in Burton on Trent and was brewed using the Union System. Please correct me if I am wrong but neither the brewery nor the Union system survived takeover by an accountant, and greedy shareholder, driven corporate beverage company. So give it a new name, ‘Bass No 2’ or however many different breweries have subsequently been used, perhaps?

Rant over, opinions welcome.

I have a new Galaxy A17 phone from E fucking E. I have had it around 4 months. I have had previous Galaxys with no problems.
After about a month it needed charging every late afternoon so I now carry, when I remember, a battery pack with me.
The screen has the response time on par with Binmen goalkeepers. It often fails to come to life and recognise me even after I have washed my finger
Apps appear and disappear with a whim, only recognising passwords when they feel like it.
The screen darkens at the drop of a hat.
It has even started listening to other people’s conversations and inserting them into the middle of something I’m typing.
I have gone into E fucking E several times abd expressed a desire to throw the sodding phone out of the window. The bright young things smile, take my phone, do strange catalytic things and speak to me woth forked tongue. Yes, I have a lot of apps. No, I don’t use them, l don’t know where they come from or what they do. Yes, please remove the ones l haven’t used. How so they know which ones by the way. Would l mind if they changed the settings to miraculously improve things. Please do I’ve no idea about settings. Can I have a new phone please as this is obviously a POETS job. No.
And now ……..
I am trying to pay for something on line. The screen says ‘open your banking app to confirm payment ‘ with a box to tick after the banking app has confirmed the payment. I open the app, confirm payment and go back to the original payment screen. It is not on the same page, no, it has gone back a page and is now asking me to confirm the bastard payment again. WTF is going on.
I will give E fucking E a last chance, after which l will go elsewhere at@ renewal time. That’ll teach them.
Bastarding modern fucking technology.

There are many Faceache accounts, written by women, that portrait he the male of the species is a mildly idiotic buffoon with no grip on reality who bumbles through life without a clue about the real masters of the universe, our partners.
I would like offer our point of view. We are logical and methodical as is proven by the washing line situation.
In the garden of our terraced house we have three washing lines, hung between wooden shed and the brick shed. One goes between the two sheds just in from the fence and remains in situ all year. Another goes along the line of the path and is rolled up after use. They have their own hooks at either end. The third line goes diagonally across, sharing a hook at the wooden shed end but has its own hook about six inches inside the other one at the brick end. The three lines have loops at the end to ensure that, if used with their own props, the props remain vertical. This makes them less of a trip hazard and in the middle raises the washing as high as possible. This helps the drying process. To help with this the three props, obviously of different heights have a regular different place to stand when not in use. Logical and sensible you will agree? It also means that, depending on the load, most times only one or two lines need to be used.
I have developed and used this logical system over 25 happy years of cohabitation with the Master of the Universe, MOTU.
I am obviously misunderstood as when the MOTU hangs the washing out it is absolute chaos. The diagonal line is hung using the outer of the hooks, obviously preventing it reaching the maximum height. The props are used randomly, causing trip hazards and sagging lines. The washing is hung haphazardly, often using more lines than needed and without hanging socks etc in pairs. Even taking the lines down results in both lines and props being scattered to the four winds.
Over the years my reasonable and helpful attempts to explain the system has resulted in increasing acerbic language and gestures.
Now you may say this seems a bit over the top but nay, it is an example of the reasonable, methodical, practical, and satisfying, logic of the average male. I could, and may, provide further examples in an attempt to address the imbalance.

Would it be asking too much, when ashtrays are put out, to leave a few tables upŵind without ashtrays. In summer many of us non smokers are trapped indoors by both the aroma and sight of smoking and associated detrius.
We don’t want to stop you, just avoid you. Dog ends, empty packets, ash, foul aromas, why impose those on others? Keep it clean and personal.

It’s hot, I’ve been in two pubs serving real ale today. The first one, I took a sip and said to the bar person ‘I’m not convinced about this beer. Would you like to try some?’
The reply was ‘That’s OK, I thought it was end of barrel, thanks for confirming. What do you want?”
Am I being unreasonable in expecting better?
The second had three pumps, I chose which one I thought would have the bigger turnaround. It was 20.9C but not undrinkable if you like sweet toffee tasting brews. However it shouldn’t taste like that and was a pale shadow of the beer I know. Should I have returned it?
Both were aptly logged on Whatpub and Untapped.
Do we need a new Faceache page promoting ‘I’ve got python in my pub?
Discuss.

I have been told I am a COB (Curmudgeonly Old Bastard) when it comes to warm beer. I admit it, but I do understand, and sympathise with the problems of keeping cask ale in warm weather. However, after speaking to landlords and bar staff I wonder if many of them do.
My simple explanation is that warm beer is caused by it sitting in the handpunp cylinder or line and not being served very often. In a recent experience we ordered 3 halves in GBG pub. The first was 21.4C, second 18.8C and the third 16.4C. And the recommended temperature is 12-14C. Surely this shows that beers quickly rise to remember temperature in the handpump cylinder and although the line may be insulated it only slows the rise down?
The main solution, IMHO, is a python. This is where all the beer lines are wrapped together with insulation, with another line or more, of cold water included in the insulation and connected to the handpump cylinder. The cold water keeps the beer in the lines and cylinder cool.
This means good beer for the customers, less wastage for the pub amd satisfaction all round. I know that pythons are expensive and I’m not suggesting that they should be installed as a matter of course but surely during refurbishment of pubs and upgrades it should be possible to do this?
In the meantime it might help if, during warm weather, the range of beers on offer is reduced, even halved. Again in another Good Beer Guide pub the six beers were measured between 16.4C and 24.1C. If fewer beers were on offer would the temperature be reduced?
Another option is to forget cask ale and buy the Bottle Conditioned versions if and when available.
I hope this helps understand my, and others, position on the matter?

DFor the first time I feel ashamed to support the Labour Party. A decent man is being hounded by the media, opportunists, and many who just want to jump on the bandwagon.
Keith Starmer won an election two years ago with a huge majority. If he was the right man then what has changed? I know a week is a long time in politics but you cannot change the world in a day. He is working towards a better country, albeit slowly but surely, with the knowledge that whoever is in charge has very little wriggle room no matter what is said.
Are we to become a banana republic, changing leadership randomly every few months? There has to be a certain continuity and consistently with the focus on the future and not a constant harping back to what happened in the past.
The media seem to now have power with no sense of responsibility. Sowing the seeds of doubt, being sensational, lacking objectively, and stirring where it needs to settle. We have a free press, rightly so, but I feel it has more and more become a vehicle for irresponsible headline seekers than sensible thought provoking journalism.
To me, the alternatives to Kier Starmer do not stand up to scrutiny. Wes Streeting has all the charisma of a used car salesman. Apart from sanctimonious soundbites has he offered viable alternative policies for when he may come to power? If has no intention of becoming PM when why is he behaving like this? Is he unknowingly being manipulated by those in smoke filled rooms? What has he been promised?
There is no doubt that Andy Burnham has done wonders for Manchester, he has frequently told us so. However, is it easier to do things as a mayor than as PM? The Labour Party isn’t, at the moment, the Andy Burnham party. Why has he failed twice previously to become leader.
And to the loyal MP’s who are calling for Kier to resign, where is your loyalty? My own one, Clive Lewis, is a case in point. A good constituency PM but seemingly unable to stop meddling in higher things and then take responsibility. Be honest, if you want the top job then say so. You are there partly to the efforts of the current PM. We have had some disastrous, if well intentioned, leaders in the past. I have agreed with their sentiments but have always been realistic enough to know the electorate would not vote for them.
It seems to me that.
Sunday rant over. Have a great day Fathers everywhere.

Reading the comments about the new CAMRA pub scoring system with interest.
Many of the comments mention temperature so it makes me wonder what temperature do landlords aim to serve their cask ales at? I’ve had several pints recently I could have made tea with. I know CAMRA recommends 12-14C but, even allowing a degree either side, it still isn’t being maintained as the weather warms. For now is the winter of our discontent, not made glorious by this summer of Murk.